5 Simple Steps to Great Sex during Menopause

The reduction in the production of the hormone estrogen during perimenopause and menopause can result changes in a woman’s sex drive and overall function. Perimenopausal and menopausal women will very likely suffer some decrease in desire for caressing and stroking, and this lack of sensitivity may affect their feelings about sex on a psychological level.  This can be very frustrating for both the woman and her partner, especially if a woman was very sexually active prior to these changes.

Lower estrogen also means that the blood supply to the vagina will also wane and affect a woman’s ability to lubricate, causing intercourse to be uncomfortable and even painful.  The dryness of the vagina can cause irritation and bleeding.  In addition, a menopausal woman will also experience bladder control problems, hot flashes, night sweats, stress and depression which will affect a good night’s sleep.  Consequently, the energy and desire for sex is drastically reduced.

There are some measures a woman can take to alleviate discomfort and improve her libido.  The following guidelines are just a few things you can do to re-energize your sex life during menopause.

1) Lubricants –There are a wide variety of lubricants on the market today.  If your primary method of birth control is condoms, the best products are water-soluble such as K-Y Jelly and Astroglide, which will not weaken the latex of condoms.  Lubricants such as baby oil, olive oil and petroleum jelly may promote bacteria and are particularly dangerous for those in the midst of chemotherapy, who may have a compromised immune system.

2) Estrogen Creams – Products such as Premarin or Estrace applied topically directly to the vagina via application can not only increase lubrication, but also improve the elasticity and thicken the vaginal walls.  These are only available by prescription and do have some side effects due to their estrogen content.  If you experience side effects such as headache, nausea, vaginal pain, swelling of the hands, feet or ankles and chest pain, discontinue using these products and see your doctor.

3) Intimacy – It is often taken for granted, but many women would be agree how the simple act of intimacy with her partner can easily be ignored at this time of her life.   Children, finances, and work are all priorities when a woman is in her mid-40’s and 50’s, hence the marriage may suffer from inertia, or lack of communication and intimacy.  A simple back or foot rub while watching TV, or an extra 5 or 10 minutes and cuddle time in the bedroom will go a long way to increase desirable feelings for her partner.

4) Stimulation – Now would be a good time to change your sexual routine with your partner.  Have sex in a different place, use sex toys to stimulate the clitoris, find time to masturbate when no one is home or when you travel for business.  There are countless devices available online which can be purchased discreetly and help to enhance erotic feelings.  You may also find that books or videos will help.

5) Counseling- A visit to a therapist to talk it out on a regular basis can enhance self image, especially if you have experienced some weight gain or other physical changes.  It is important to remember that sex is mostly psychological for a woman, and the power of her brain can help overcome any physical problems she may have.